The Great Amigo Thread...

Apparently, he didn't pay any attention to our defensive deficiencies in 2014 and especially in 2015.

He's completely ignored how much we lacked on that side of the ball.

How do I know this? Because this is the 2nd season in a row he is saying that a workhorse RB is practically a guarantee to get us to the SB. He says having Peterson would give us a shot at 19-0, and now he's saying Elliot is the only thing missing from getting us to a championship.

Uhhh...what about coaching? What about lack of pass rush. Mediocre interior defense? A crap secondary?

A RB is gonna fix all of that, eh?

And I haven't even touched on the idiocy of not drafting scared and bypassing a possible franchise QB.
 
My Daughter Is Off; Got A Story For You
Hostile said:
Hey guys, thank you all for the emotional support during this time. Rough day seeing your baby walk away. The next time she sees me I will be 100 pounds lighter.

I actually have a Cowboys related story to tell you. Prior to dropping her off we took one of the open house tours of the Provo Cuty Center LDS Temple. As we were getting ready to start the tour a young woman behind us said, "Excuse me, but are you here from Tucson?"

We told her that we were indeed and she and her fiancé had both served in the Tucson Mission and she had spent some time in the Spanish speaking Wards in our geographic area. He had not.

She said, "I was so sure that I had seen you before." When she told me her name I remembered some of the stories about her incredible faith and love if the Spanish speaking people of Tucson, and I did sort of recognize her a little.

I was wearing my leather Dallas Cowboys jacket and a gray Cowboys t-shirt. Her fiancé said, "She told me she thought you were from Tucson, and I said, they might be, he's wearing Cowboys gear."

No joke at all. I told you this is our state.
 
Yeah, because the obvious assumption when you see someone in Cowboys gear is that they are from Tucson specifically. Not Arizona, but Tucson.
 
100 lbs lighter, eh?

For some strange reason, I just don't see this happening.
 
Anger. Rising.

This is our state, amigos.

The Spanish peoples of Tucson. Uh, that's like what half or more?
 
Remember when Hostile threw a fit over True Grit being remade? I just heard that Tommy Lee Jones is remaking The Cowboys.

Maybe he'll lose that 100 lbs by completely shitting himself.
 
Remember when Hostile threw a fit over True Grit being remade? I just heard that Tommy Lee Jones is remaking The Cowboys.

Maybe he'll lose that 100 lbs by completely shitting himself.

He will pass it off because of Tommy Lee Jones.
 
The Twitter Practice Threads Showed Jason Garrett Is the Right Man
First of all, thanks to @wittenacious for posting the threads. That was awesome amigo.

Second of all, this is a Pro Jason Garrett thread. If those turn your tummy, don't keep reading.

Third of all, I really can't stand our Mediots and Presstitutes. I am telling you right now if we don't take Wentz they will never recover. It doesn't matter how good the guy we do get is. Want proof? Zack Martin is so far superior to Johnny Manziel it's not funny, and they are still harping on passing on him.

I began the idea for this thread on Day 1 of the tweet threads when on Page 3, I read this comment by Cowboys Nation.

"The Jason Garrett brainwashing has begun."

What followed is an interview with Carson Wentz where he sounded like he had been around Jason Garrett for years. He sounded just like him. He talked about focusing every day, taking it one day at a time, and improving. You guys have heard me say forever, "Don't listen to me, listen to his best players. They sound just like him." This is usually followed by some inane comment about "what do you expect them to say?"

Okay, so here is the poster boy for this football game, and on the day he met Jason Garrett he adopted the philosophy. What did you expect him to say? Jason Garrett is his coach for one game. This isn't Tony Romo you can ignore here. This isn't Sean Lee or Jason Witten or Dez Bryant. He is not yet a Dallas Cowboy, and he bought in.

Brainwashing? How about making an impression? Dare I say he made an impact? If you can't see it, open your eyes. This kid has no loyalty to Garrett whatsoever, and boom, first rattle out of the cage, he has bought in. Folks, that is coaching. It isn't all Xs and Os. And before anyone chimes in that I am saying Garrett can't teach Xs and Os, you better look back at his History. You'd be wrong to say that, dead wrong. In fact, early on the comments were that is all he can do. He doesn't relate well to people. Remember the days when the Defensive players didn't even really know who he was?

The entire coaching staff made a huge impression on these kids. If you doubt this, take a look at this comment from Joey Ickes on page 3 of the Day 3 thread.

"You can see/feel the intensity pick up when Garrett pulls the guys in for these compete periods. The guys love it."

Contrast that against a comment by someone simply named Charles.

"Cowboys practice is so much more efficient than Jaguars practice. It's insane."

Then Jeff Risdon added this.

"Been a fantastic spirited North Practice by the Cowboys staff. Makes Jaguars pace and action look like an informercial on dust mops."

I 100% guarantee you every kid on the North squad is hoping to come to Dallas. Not just because all of them secretly do. It is largely because he does what a great Coach does, he gets inside you and makes you want to go at it.

If you still don't like him you're not just wrong, you're dead wrong. That isn't a sin, but it is an oversight.

He is turning this team around. Injuries derailed us last year. They won't again.

:lol
 
Mediots and Presstitutes. Ho ho, ha ha. My sides.

And are you kidding me with the "sound just like Garrett" thing as proof of anything?

Garrett is a fucking robotic walking encyclopedia of useless coachspeak.

What he says is not unique, nor are the boxed responses that players give.

Hey, Wentz said some clichés. Holy fuckin' shit that's Garrett!! FAP FAP FAP!!!
 
According to Mr. Amigo, every single player ever wants to or wanted to be a Cowboy.
 
Hostile said:
I remember hearing a song by Billy Dean where he said, "I was Roger Staubach in my back yard..." It made me cry the first time I heard that because to this day I love that man for the person he is.
Oh, for fucks sake.

I wonder how he felt when Adam Sandler mentioned him in the Talking Goat.
 
Unsubstantiated Rumor That Would Thrill Me To My Shorts
Hostile said:
I got a guy who works for the Cardinals telling me that Dan Snyder has seen rumors that Dallas will sign RG3. According to him, Snyder freaking hates this idea so much that he may give RG3 back the starting job, try to renegotiate his contract to save on the cap, and let Cousins leave. He thinks that he can convince RG3 that if he doesn't take the deal that he will never earn the money he will lose back anyway.

All Cousins did after all, was get them in the post season and break the passing yardage record in their franchise History, and 2nd in TD passes for 1 season. Yeah, consider letting that guy leave, and keep the guy who has divided your team because you invested so much in him to start with. Good plan Danny!

Please let this be true. Please let this be true. Please let this be true.

He said this rumor might hit the media in about a week, he thought I'd get a giggle out of it. My only complaint about that is if it does hit the media and Danny Boy hears the snickers he may change his mind.

All of this because he does not want to Franchise Cousins and his fear of Dallas coming out ahead.
:lol
 
Shit, I would imagine Dan Snyder is hoping like hell the Cowboys sign RGIII.
 
:picard

That may be the dumbest rumor I have seen that guy post. And there have been a lot of really, really dumb ones. It is mind boggling how little sense it would make for Snyder to do something like that for those reasons.
 
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