Test...

Carp said:
I farted in the shower this morning when the water was running over my b-hole...it was freaking hilarious. I laughed for an inapproriate amount of time.
Click to expand...
Sometimes if you get the amount of water around the area and there is contact, it is like farting in the tub. Not only is the audio effect more profound, the pungency is magnified.
 
iHzv4GkjIqEnC.gif
 
Thanks, now Boberts will drown this thread in his drool.
 
I would like to apologize for my hurtful comments towards McNuttz. They were wrong and I sincerely apologize.
 
Great, there are tornadoes popping up all over the panhandle right now. I really want some rain, but I really don't want a tornado. There is softball size hail in some of these storms and 90+ MPH winds. That's just the storms that haven't produced a tornado.
 
Iamtdg said:
Great, there are tornadoes popping up all over the panhandle right now. I really want some rain, but I really don't want a tornado. There is softball size hail in some of these storms and 90+ MPH winds. That's just the storms that haven't produced a tornado.
Click to expand...

When I was looking at possibly moving back home in the Dallas area, I really liked a suburb named Rockwall.

The one and only thing that turned me off about it? It's proximity to tornado alley.

It was just outside of tornado alley, but close enough to where you could hear the sirens from the nearby community that was in the alley.

No thanks.
 
There was a tornado that hit here in 1970 that was an EF5 and destroyed about half of Lubbock. We are due. It looks like the first round is going to stay east of us. But anytime it is as hot as it is and a storm pops up it has the potential to turn bad quickly.
 
Okay...I am getting on the plane to come home and I got first class, third row, window seat.

They board "those needing assistance" first. So this I guess 80 year old broad gets on. Then they call first class, I was first in line.

So we get to board the plane, the broad is in front of me. She goes straight to my seat, plops her scrawny ass down.

I am now faced with a moral dilemma. Do I call this old bag out and make her move to her seat or I just take hers and be a swell guy?

F that. I made her get up and move to the aisle.

She's like "the lady said this was my seat"...ah bullshit, I was right behind her and the flight attendant said nothing of the kind. She even mumbled something about having a bad back.

I am a dick like that.
 
First class?

Baller.
 
Ugh.

They have the Wade Hard Knocks on right now and they are laboring over Todd Lowber.

:lol
 
boozeman said:
Okay...I am getting on the plane to come home and I got first class, third row, window seat.

They board "those needing assistance" first. So this I guess 80 year old broad gets on. Then they call first class, I was first in line.

So we get to board the plane, the broad is in front of me. She goes straight to my seat, plops her scrawny ass down.

I am now faced with a moral dilemma. Do I call this old bag out and make her move to her seat or I just take hers and be a swell guy?

F that. I made her get up and move to the aisle.

She's like "the lady said this was my seat"...ah bullshit, I was right behind her and the flight attendant said nothing of the kind. She even mumbled something about having a bad back.

I am a dick like that.
Click to expand...

You also met some Army guys in plain clothes and you all decided that no one was going to hijack that plane as long as you were there
 
Bob Roberts said:
You also met some Army guys in plain clothes and you all decided that no one was going to hijack that plane as long as you were there
Click to expand...

Unfortunately not.

If I had gave up my spot THEN I would have buddied up to thwart the plot.

Sheesh.
 
boozeman said:
Okay...I am getting on the plane to come home and I got first class, third row, window seat.

They board "those needing assistance" first. So this I guess 80 year old broad gets on. Then they call first class, I was first in line.

So we get to board the plane, the broad is in front of me. She goes straight to my seat, plops her scrawny ass down.

I am now faced with a moral dilemma. Do I call this old bag out and make her move to her seat or I just take hers and be a swell guy?

F that. I made her get up and move to the aisle.

She's like "the lady said this was my seat"...ah bullshit, I was right behind her and the flight attendant said nothing of the kind. She even mumbled something about having a bad back.

I am a dick like that.
Click to expand...

I'd have done the same thing. I have to have the window seat. That way I can slouch against the window and catch a nap during the flight.

Besides, she's probably been using that "bad back" excuse to get her way for ages. The elderly are sneaky like that.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom