2014 Regular Season Predictions for the Dallas Cowboys

[Rev]

Oh my sides..

 

[UncleMilti]

This could be the biggest thing since Carp's little drawings.

 

[Clay_Allison]

L vs SF
W at Tenn
W at STL
L vs NO
L vs Hou
L at Sea
L vs NYG
W vs Wash
L vs Ariz
L vs Jax
W at NYG
L vs Phi
L at Chi
L at Phi
L vs Ind
L at Wash

4-12

We'll go in 2-1 and get utterly tuned up by NO, probably a 35 point blowout. (Typical of our games vs. NO in the Sean Payton era) then fail to bounce back against an improved Texans team, then get crushed by Seattle. The team comes home feeling sorry for itself and realizes how hopeless the defense is, Romo is questionable after getting physically mauled by the Seattle D. They get their dicks knocked in the dirt by the Giants, eke out a win over the Skins, the Cards are much better than us and we get smoked by them. Bortles has a freaking breakout game against our D. We'll get our win back at NY, then come home to face Philly for a last gasp but the defense won't be able to slow down Chip Kelly's running game and we suffer flashbacks to the pickle juice game in 2000. We go on the road to a blizzard in Chicago and Romo throws 100 picks as his back spasms in the cold if he's still even playing at that point. We get run over by Philly again but the score won't be as lopsided because the result is never in doubt. Andrew Luck throws 5 TDs in an easy win and the Skins beat us as Jason Garrett is cleaning out his office and the rest of the team is making offseason plans.

 

[data]

Damn.

 

[L.T. Fan]

Well I guess there is no need to watch the games now.

 

[NoDak]

We'll go in 2-1 and get utterly tuned up by NO, probably a 35 point blowout. (Typical of our games vs. NO in the Sean Payton era)

We've been blown out by them twice, and the other three games have been by a TD or less, with one going to OT.

And of course, the Roy Williams debacle on Thanksgiving 2010 that gave them the win. As an aside, that game was Garrett's first loss as HC. The Cowboys losing in a slaughter to Payton isn't typical. What's typical is the die was cast for us to lose in gut wrenching fashion under Garrett.

 

[data]

Isn't our record on SNF Charles Barkley turrble?

Our three games are vs NO, at NYG and at PHI.

 

[Texas Ace]

Isn't our record on SNF Charles Barkley turrble?

Our three games are vs NO, at NYG and at PHI.

Between 2006 and 2009, it was actually pretty damn good.

From 2010-present? Just awful, and usually the scene for our more epic losses.

 

[Plan9Misfit]

L vs SF
W at Tenn
W at STL
L vs NO
L vs Hou
L at Sea
W vs NYG
W vs Wash
L vs Ariz
W vs Jax
L at NYG
W vs Phi
L at Chi
L at Phi
L vs Ind
W at Wash

 

[ravidubey]

L vs SF
W at Tenn
W at STL
L vs NO
L vs Hou
L at Sea
L vs NYG
W vs Wash
L vs Ariz
L vs Jax
W at NYG
L vs Phi
L at Chi
L at Phi
L vs Ind
L at Wash

4-12

5-11. I have us sneaking in a win vs. the unbalanced Colts and Jacksonville still loses. Washington sweeps, since all they have to do is run Morris up our asses until we bleed.

Romo is cut in January to prevent escalation in salary guarantees, temporarily ushering in the Weeden era.

Jerry does whatever he can to trade up for Jameis Winston, but fails of course leading to Brett Hundley or Sean Mannion.

Garrett remains a Cowboy, but Dallas finally fires Kiffen who combined with Romo act yet again as Jerry/RHG scapegoats of the year.

 

[Clay_Allison]

5-11. I have us sneaking in a win vs. the unbalanced Colts and Jacksonville still loses. Washington sweeps, since all they have to do is run Morris up our asses until we bleed.

Romo is cut in January to prevent escalation in salary guarantees, temporarily ushering in the Weeden era.

Jerry does whatever he can to trade up for Jameis Winston, but fails of course leading to Brett Hundley or Sean Mannion.

Garrett remains a Cowboy, but Dallas finally fires Kiffen who combined with Romo act yet again as Jerry/RHG scapegoats of the year.

I want Winston like I want a blood transfusion from a prostitute that doesn't charge extra for bareback anyway, so I'll be happy to miss out on that.

 

[Clay_Allison]

We've been blown out by them twice, and the other three games have been by a TD or less, with one going to OT.

And of course, the Roy Williams debacle on Thanksgiving 2010 that gave them the win. As an aside, that game was Garrett's first loss as HC. The Cowboys losing in a slaughter to Payton isn't typical. What's typical is the die was cast for us to lose in gut wrenching fashion under Garrett.

Well, we got run out of the building by them last year and that 2006 blowout is hard to forget. So, I guess I thought it happened more often than it did. Still, I bet they blow us out this year. This defense is even worse than 2013s.

 

[Carp]

I think we need to zero this out and start over on preditions. 6 wins seems like our ceiling.

 

[Simpleton]

Yea, I voted 8-8 and no playoffs, I'm thinking 6 or 7 wins now.

 

[ravidubey]

I think we need to zero this out and start over on preditions. 6 wins seems like our ceiling.

I think Dallas is the only team in the league where there is a legit *possibility* of 0-16.

The D can't stop anyone with a running game, the QB is aging and injured, and the offense has no threat that stretches the field.

We all love this team but need to brace for the worst.

 

[Simpleton]

I think Dallas is the only team in the league where there is a legit *possibility* of 0-16.

The D can't stop anyone with a running game, the QB is aging and injured, and the offense has no threat that stretches the field.

We all love this team but need to brace for the worst.

It would probably be best for this team to bottom out this year even though it's tough to admit before the season officially starts because there is always some inkling of hope/optimism.

It would guarantee that Garrett is gone, we would probably move on from Romo and the QB crop looks to be strong this year. We already have a strong base on offense for a young QB with an elite WR in Dez and what will be an elite OL, and it would give us time to hopefully rebuild the defense with expectations being low.

The ironic thing about where this team is right now, and has been the last few years, is that the situation will likely be pretty good for a young QB since the organization completely neglected building around Romo and had to spend most of his prime years rebuilding most of the roster.

Basically we wasted the prime years of a very good QB because of organizational ineptitude and instead spent those years building a roster for the next QB.

 

[ravidubey]

Basically we wasted the prime years of a very good QB because of organizational ineptitude and instead spent those years building a roster for the next QB.

So damn true. Who upstairs did Romo piss off?

 

[Cowboysrock55]

It would probably be best for this team to bottom out this year even though it's tough to admit before the season officially starts because there is always some inkling of hope/optimism.

It would guarantee that Garrett is gone, we would probably move on from Romo and the QB crop looks to be strong this year. We already have a strong base on offense for a young QB with an elite WR in Dez and what will be an elite OL, and it would give us time to hopefully rebuild the defense with expectations being low.

The ironic thing about where this team is right now, and has been the last few years, is that the situation will likely be pretty good for a young QB since the organization completely neglected building around Romo and had to spend most of his prime years rebuilding most of the roster.

Basically we wasted the prime years of a very good QB because of organizational ineptitude and instead spent those years building a roster for the next QB.

You can rebuild a team damn fast in the NFL as long as you have the cap space. The sad part is we have absolutely no cap space and probably won't for at least a year after cutting Romo. If this team does bottom out this year I hope we just cut Romo. It's not personal but this team will never be able to rebuild with his massive contract on the books. Having him mentor a young QB for a year wouldn't do us any good other then to set us back for another year.

 

[ravidubey]

You can rebuild a team damn fast in the NFL as long as you have the cap space. The sad part is we have absolutely no cap space and probably won't for at least a year after cutting Romo. If this team does bottom out this year I hope we just cut Romo. It's not personal but this team will never be able to rebuild with his massive contract on the books. Having him mentor a young QB for a year wouldn't do us any good other then to set us back for another year.

They'll be forced to cut him, c-rock. A huge portion of his 2015 salary guarantees if he's still on the roster in March.

This defense is almost guaranteeing Romo's farewell tour.

 

[Cowboysrock55]

They'll be forced to cut him, c-rock. A huge portion of his 2015 salary guarantees if he's still on the roster in March.

This defense is almost guaranteeing Romo's farewell tour.

The only hope for this defense is that it looks much better with the multiple starters that we didn't see during preseason. How you don't try and get a guy like Melton some game time to shake the rust off is beyond me.